Meteor

Meteor, like a massive fire ball that created brightness on the sky as it burned itself when went through the atmosphere. Flashes and gone in sudden.

“What if you having trouble in this country, who can you rely? What if you are broke?” She asked, she is trying to remind me that I have to pay her appreciates. “I still have my credit card from my daddy,” I answered. “NO!! Forget about the credit card, it’s us, we’re the one you can rely to,” she said it in loud. I really didn’t know what to say so I keep quiet and go to school because I’m in hurry.

You make me remind one of my relative who has asked me the same question during the farewell party, she said "who on earth are you going to seek for help if you are in trouble?" I knew she expect me to answer "Mr. A." Surprisingly, I did not, I Said “I will rather die, not by suicide but survive as far as I could; it’s a shame for me to ask help from others,” I feel bad of my pride when you claimed that you have help me allot, it’s hurt my feeling. I did paid my rent.

I don’t want to argue with you anymore, you are so childish, always want to win, asking opinion like forcing me to accept your selection. No point to argue with you, I better save my energy for something else.

I’m just a student, I don’t earn money, please stop demand money from me. I’m not your princess daughter, I’m international student, there are something i can't that your princess daughters could. Sorry princess, I'll leave if I can’t stand her anymore.

August

Once she asked me to get myself a girl friend. I said no. Then she replied me with “how about a boy friend?” I didn’t know what to say so I keep quiet and go back to my work.

Tomorrow will be a good day to meet her in the boat show. I have to say, I didn’t feel anything special towards her. She was too lady, with her big feet and big hands. For me, that wasn’t pretty, or attractive enough. As soon we speak to each other, I found her might be origin from my country toward the slang and language she used. All those “la” and “pa” accents. But she wasn’t looked like any lady from my country. Which was strange, since she told me she was actually KL born but been lived in Italy as soon she graduated from primary school. She invites me for her boat show tomorrow. Anyway, we met each other during the flight from west to east, and I did drank a lot ‘Singapore Slang’ cocktails which provided free of charge from aircrews. I have paid the price to deserve it. She is professional sailors from Italy, and I’m a peasant orang-utan from KL which needed to be re-educate in west. I dare not to mention where my home country is precisely.

Anyway back to the day before tomorrow. I seat in front of the harbor whole day alone, watching the preparation of the boat show. The feeling of loneliness came towards from the cold and dryly air. You might be one of the crew, setting up your boat for presentation tomorrow. How nice and wonderful it is. I started to think of my future. Wonder when I would get enough money to earn those boats. Stop dreaming. I took out my romance novel and continue my unfinished story which called as "20 Fragments of a Ravenous Youth". It is about a peasant girl who searching for a perfect love. She started with a man who was a film director, but as soon she realizes he wasn’t the right man for her, she leaves. Another part of the story was she accepted a foreigner from English, but as soon she discovered how useless he was when she was in trouble, she broke up with him. The story continues goes around with all the different type of men and she has finally realized the first one was the best for her, but it was too late for both to be together. The ending is a bit sad. I learn the story toward how those men treated the girl and make her satisfy to stay longer with her. I have once dream to have a blonde wife in the future.

Yes, I might be a playboy, flirty or drifter who does not own anything yet. I’m useless in this country. I wonder how shiny life I might be if I continue my second part of my life in my home country. Arch, stop thinking about it, I have been given an assignment from god which required me to come here for somethings.

Forever 20

She must has tells something wrong about me to her mother.

Sydney, by appearance, so modern, noble, but when i travel street by street to looking for possible part time job, I find Sydney a second Johor. So mess, dim and dirty. I refuse to find any better thing to compared it with my home country. I learning Australia by making friend first. They can easily start any type of conversation with stranger, without shy or fear, unlike us, because we had always been taught and reminded by school teachers and family that we have to avoid to talk to stranger. "Don't tell them where you live," "don't tell them anything regarding your family," "don't tell them how much money is in your wallet." For sure i will not tell it to anyone if they never ask, or even they asked, I might not telling the true because no point for letting others knowing it. I'm just an ordinary guy from poor family.

Australia, It was the place I going to stay for several year and make better life through Western education. When Amanda remind her eldest sister that she has a fully developed mind, I feel empty in my brain. I have to be re-educate. I feeling useless in this country. I feeling I can die for any kind of situation. No safety in this country, men easily get drunk in the pub!! Not by reading the news of a young international student couples been murdered at waterloo, Sydney" at the first night I in Australia. I think the unsafe feeling come from I knowing nothing from this country. I seen beggars anyway in this country. They sit randomly on the street and play lovely music with their old and lousy instrument, and people don't call them beggars but street performers.

Sorry for my English. I don't write good grammar as it wasn't my mother tongue. There is a funny conversation between an Australian and me, she said she feels proud as an Australian because their government provide unemployment allowance for resident whom refuse to get a job. I don't find any good reason of the benefit, as It's making their resident become lazy and depended to their government. In my home country, our government never provides unemployment benefit, but they did offer us cheap petrol that making our life easier.

Are you sure that our country doesn't provide any unemployment allowance? No, we did provide it, but not much.

I am worry

You will not understand how serious of these Singaporean and Malaysian will treat people like me who is going to their country from Australia. They assume Australia government do not wok hard for the virus, as Kelvin Rudd (the current Australia's prime minister) claimed "it was rather mass media influenza instead of virus influenza". I really don't want to be isolate in Singapore, Malaysia and Thailand. Neither one. I want to eat sushi with momo, Jingjing and LightTZM.

Access request and ALL NEW SERIES

I realize i have to protect myself and take responsibility of what i have written at the previous. It involved too many dirty little secret, and so it has to be as much confidential as possible and only open to my favorite friends and family members.

A Pure chocolate and new entertainment series will be transfer to this website. No more insult or criticize. More and more free gift will be giving away. Feliacia and Jingjing(temporary) fans club will be coming up soon. I want to start to make some movie. If you found any grammar mistake, please let me know, i will pay you if i want to.

All the previous posts have been transferred to lestergdx.blogspot. com and is currently close reserve only to my special guests. For people who never receive my invitation email and still wish to access my dirty little secret website, please leave me your email address and brief introduce yourself in the comment box, i will take into the consideration and reply as soon as possible.